Sought After

And you will be called Sought After, a City Not Forsaken…

Wait…Sacrifice is supposed to be HARD?!

with 7 comments

When I quit my job to go on the World Race, people complimented my willingness to sacrifice.  When I lived in a tent or slept on floors for the better part of a year, I was praised for my eagerness to surrender.  But here’s the secret…that was the easy part…Walking away from a 9-5 sit-at-my-desk job was more of a joy than a sacrifice.  Living in a tent in the African bush was more adventure than surrender.  Not that it didn’t have its challenges or require faith, but those are the challenges I prefer and the type of faith I enjoy building.

Homesickness was never an issue; being immersed in a new country, new culture and new language every four weeks doesn’t really leave much time for dreaming of home.

But now I find myself five months into an indefinite commitment to a country and a people not my own.  I love Cambodia, but it’s not all elephants and fried tarantulas.

This Christmas was not my first away from home, but it was my first in a hot climate.  It was my first Christmas morning waking up alone.  It was my first Christmas spent with people (awesome people) with whom my longest relationship was four months.  This year I missed my brother’s home-coming from a 12-month deployment in Kuwait, two of my best friend’s visits to West Virginia and another best friend’s daughter’s first Christmas.

I knew being a “missionary” would not be easy.  I was prepared for the work to be hard, the air to be humid and the culture to be strange.  What I was not prepared for was realizing that giving things up is hard.  Dealing with false guilt (self-imposed guilt, to be sure) over where I should be spending Christmas is hard.   I finally realized that in choosing to be here I have chosen not to be home, among people I love.

It seems to be a self-evident concept: sacrifice is hard.

I know now that in choosing missionary-ness, I am choosing sacrifice.  Small as it is compared to what others have or are giving up , it is sacrifice all the same.

As I am learning this I pray that I will fall so far in love with Jesus that He truly satisfies not only all my needs, but all my wants. When you pray for me, ask God to so captivate my heart that everything else disappears.  I am convinced that this, above all else, will empower me to serve Him and love His people.

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Written by stephndavis

January 14, 2011 at 6:29 am

7 Responses

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  1. First, I can’t believe you posted 2 blogs in 2 weeks. That’s got to be a record for you. Secondly, I laughed out loud when you said “it’s not all elephants and fried tarantulas” Ha! But mostly, I’m learning the same things. It’s harder than I expected when though I’m in a place that I LOVE! Culture differences are hard. The things that you are leaving behind are difficult to lay down. I’m glad you feel comfortable sharing these things because I think a lot of times we feel like if we’re doing what we’re called to do it shouldn’t feel so hard or something ridiculous like that. Anyway, loved getting to actually talk to you about all of this over Christmas. Love you and am praying for you!

    Lisa

    January 14, 2011 at 9:23 am

  2. Thank you for the post and the insight into some of what you are dealing with. While I can’t fully appreciate it, I am sure there are times when it is a bit overwhelming. I especially liked your prayer request. I am sure that if you will keep your focus on Jesus he will provide your needs and either provide or change your wants. Love you bunches.

    Mike Darby

    January 14, 2011 at 9:39 am

  3. I will indeed join you in prayer that God will continue to captivate your heart more fully. The process has already begun and He is faithful to complete the work He begins in us. I will also remind you that God always rewards sacrifice in His name and that the rewards far out shine the temporary discomfort caused by the sacrifice.

    Love you, Rick

    Rick Smith

    January 14, 2011 at 3:03 pm

  4. We will certainly remember you in prayer!!! We missed you too! But we will have our own Christmas celebration this spring at the General Lewis Inn!!!:). I think you and Lisa are so brave to go so far away to serve God! He has a plan and although it’s not always easy, He will see you through it!!! We love you!

    Amanda

    January 15, 2011 at 1:41 am

  5. Steph, your Grandma Beverly used to say that homesickness was one of the most difficult things she’d ever had to face. Nothing hurts quite like it. Charity and I were just talking this afternoon about the necessity of laying some very dear things down in order to pick up what the Lord has for you. The cost is real. Pray for you every day. Love U!

    Barb Mentzer

    January 17, 2011 at 7:12 pm

  6. Steph,you will never know just how much of an inspiration you are to me.I am so proud of you and the sacrifices you are making for our Lord Jesus Christ.It gives me strength to do what He wants me to do seeing your willingness.Fix your eyes on Him and He will see you through these tough times.I will pray He sees you through the home sickness so you can continue to bless others there as well as at home with your example of what a Christian truely is all about. I love steph!

    cindy blake

    January 18, 2011 at 1:27 pm

  7. We are praying and will continue to do so! Yes it’s hard but worth it!!! 🙂

    Deb and Vicki

    April 1, 2011 at 10:37 am


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